| Joke
1
Hello Mudda, Hello Fodda.
Dear
Dad,
$¢hoo£ i$ rea££¥ great. I am making
£ot$ of friend$ and $tud¥ing ver¥ hard. With
a££ m¥ $tuff, I $imp£¥ ¢an't
think of an¥thing I need, $o if ¥ou wou£d £ike,
¥ou ¢an ju$t $end me a ¢ard, a$ I wou£d
£ove to hear from ¥ou.
£ove,
¥our $on
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Joke 2
Dear Son,
I know that astronomy, economics, and oceanography are enough
to keep even an honor student busy. Do not forget that the
pursuit of knowledge is a noble task, and you can never study
enough.
Love,
Dad
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Joke 3
Prove: Stupid People Make More Money.
Engineers
and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.
Now we have a mathematical proof that explains why this is
true:
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows,
Work
Time = Power
Since
knowledge is power, and time is money, we have:
Work
Money = Knowledge
Solving
for Money, we get:
Work
Knowledge = Money
Thus,
as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless
of the amount of Work done.
Conclusion:
The Less you Know, the More you Make.
Note:
It has been speculated that the reason why Bill Gates dropped
out of Harvard's math program was because he stumbled upon
this proof as an undergraduate, and dedicated the rest of
his career to the pursuit of ignorance.
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Joke 4
Fine Dorms
On
the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students,
pointing out some of the rules. "The female dormitory
will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male
dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking
this rule will be fined $20 the first time."
He continued, "Anybody caught breaking this rule the
second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will
incur a hefty fine of $180. Are there any questions?"
At
this, a male student in the crowd inquired, "How much
for a season pass?"
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